Crazy things start to happen when you have an
abundance of time, imagination, and wireless internet. Contemplation about
global warming, feng shui, chocolate, and online dating swirl and simmer inside
the brain until the illogical begins to seem possible.
My intense candy cravings and lack of social contact,
combined, led me to reactivate my OKCupid! profile about 9 months ago. I had no
real agenda other than shameless self-promotion and solicitation. I was very
clear and upfront about my circumstances, that I was living on another
continent and serving in the Peace Corp, and that I was only looking for “new
friends” who might want to send me M & M’s in the mail. I specified that messages would also be
welcome from people who: a) wanted advice on traveling to Peru, b) were
interested in learning more about the Peace Corps, c) had the ability to run
faster than me, or d) were otherwise awesome.
Although I had to contend with some unwanted
attention from “rilonelyman” and “ebay-holic” I was surprised by the quality of
men who initiated communication. Instead of the usual one liners, like “hi hun”
or “nice butt” people made an effort to compliment me on my “mad running
skills” and my “fun and fascinating life”--- kind and curious people from
Oklahoma, Minnesota, Seattle, and Missouri, among other places.
But then something rather unexpected happened --- The Return of Rob Gordon! “Rob” is the boy from back home, who, much like the
protagonist of “High Fidelity,” boasts an impressive record collection and an
encyclopedic musical memory. He is the fun and fabulous guy who dated, then
rejected me, in the months before Peace Corps. He broke my heart, then he
bought my car. And like every great post-modern romance, I believe our spark
was rekindled by excessive drinking and Facebook. Fast forward to several months later and I am
officially in a long-distance relationship with good ol’ Rob. I was looking for
chocolate, but found a boyfriend instead. J
Surprisingly, love in the Peace Corps happens more
often than you would think. We leave the comforts of home behind, which may
include a robust social/dating life, and most of us enter this experience
anticipating two years of solitude or celibacy. And for many months that was my
reality. I craved rhythm, routine, and an amazing tan. I gained 15 pounds, my
hair was a hot, layered mess, and my buttoned-down fashion sense rivaled that
of the local Mormons. Yet I began to grow in new and exciting ways; I became
more comfortable living in the present moment and conjugating verbs in the past
tense.
When I finally dipped my toe back into the dating
pool, even in a self-deprecating, non-serious manner, perhaps my joie de vivre was apparent. Khalil
Gilbran writes that “Beauty is a light in the heart” and I believe that many
volunteers, those who find peace and joy in their service, emanate that
radiance. Marathon Skype sessions, flirty text messages, and animated discussions
about The Future have become the nuts and bolts of my current relationship, and
I am happier than I would have imagined. I guess my unsolicited relationship
advice to those contemplating the Peace Corps, or any major life change, is
rather straightforward: Trust yourself, indulge your passion, and, as Rob would
say, “something will happen.”
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